Monday, May 08, 2006

Yeah, so what if I did...

I promised yesterday that I would have something good today.

I lied.

I've tried working over the posting I wanted to do but, for the life of me, I just couldn't get it to work the way I wanted. So instead, I'm going to try to explain what I wanted to do. If it makes sense, it makes sense... If it doesn't, well... no matter.

Anyhoo....

Somebody sent me one of those 'uplifting' creepy Christian web links concerning...well... I'll let the link speak for itself. You'll find it HERE.

Now, I have nothing against this kind of malarky. My original idea was to combine this unapologetic guilt wrencher into the template of your standard dirty joke. When you think about it they have the same format:

1. There's a setup.

2. Something miraculous/strange/abnormal happens.

3. There's a big pay-off.

There were two jokes I tried to meld with this and both had superb openings (both are old standards that I hadn't heard in a long time so I found them funny again).

The first begins thusly:

Two midgets win the lottery...

The second starts like this:

Two nuns are driving down the road when a vampire lands on the hood of their car...

The thing about jokes and religious propaganda is that they both invoke key emotive responses by the use of simple yet descriptive language like, "a single tear glistened on his cheek" and "I couldn't even get on the bed."

The pay offs are essentially the same: you either laugh or want to slit your own throat.

Anyway, I couldn't quite get the two formats to mix the way that I wanted. But that's not to say I'm giving up. I'm gonna work on it for another day or so.

(Bonus points if you can tell me what jokes I'm referring to.)

7 Comments:

Blogger Jimmy Porter said...

I prefer this kind of Christian Website

www.yourgoingtohell.com

Direct and to the point, although they should correct the gramatical mistake in the domain name.

8:31 pm  
Blogger Phil said...

I was going to say, jimmy, that the pine trees also know that wayne will burn in hades.

9:27 pm  
Blogger Jett Loe said...

Wow - the background music at Your Going to Hell rocks!

8:54 am  
Blogger The Rev said...

I thought the post was funny by simply trying to explain your post.

Hey... I liked your blog from me. Would you link my blog from yours?

5:08 pm  
Blogger WOA said...

No problem, Steve. I meant to link to you earlier but work/commitments/life got in the way. I'll do it right...NOW!

5:53 pm  
Blogger The Rev said...

Thank you muchly.

6:38 pm  
Blogger Phil said...

You may as well tell us the jokes...I have no idea.

12:55 pm  

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